Is that what we’ve gained? Maybe we never stop standing in the middle of a room with the hallmarks of responsibility floating about us, but we gain the ability to hold ourselves upright, to stand for longer. To withstand.

Maybe that’s all adulthood is – perpetual, relentless trying. Although, even as I thought this, I couldn’t help but wonder, when did we go from vision to spectacle? When did our every achievement stop warranting a round of applause, and instead, our mistakes and imperfections gained an audience of wide-eyed starers?

I sound cynical. And God-freaking-help-me, I am. But I’m also a dreamer. I’m a spiritualist. I laugh a lot and love it even more. Mostly, I create. I spend my days inside the minds of romantic poets. I listen to Taylor Swift’s more poignant tunes. I often wish I could wade into the water of the Lake Distract in a gauzy gown like every Keira Knightly movie ever (but primarily with the aesthetic of Pride and Prejudice, 2005 version only). In that world, my biggest problem might be catching a chill and having to spend several days under the dutiful care of my soon-to-be very wealthy lover. I feel as though I have caught the chill without the joy of the gauzy gown.